May 28 – 29, 2016

May 28-29

Overnight Camel Safari Weekend in Pushkar! Although it will go down in Imke’s History as “Sexual Harassment Weekend”… I’ll explain… Just keep reading…

At 5pm, on time and everything (Indian miracle…), the safari guys came to pick Albert and I up. We walked to the starting point, where three charming girls, Lucy, Amanda and Liv, were already waiting, on the camel and everything.

We each had our own animal and our own personal “driver”, sitting behind us, except for Albert. His camel was strapped to mine, which made us very, very slow… I applauded my camel guy for his decision to do something about it, until I heard his solution: “You ride alone, ok? It’s like a horse!”

Uhm, little problem, mate.. I have zero horse experience, I am very bad in imitating your “riding tricks” and I don’t know any Hindi commands!

Well, I learned pretty quickly there is one thing exactly the same as riding a horse: a camel also feels when its driver is nervous and/or insecure… After 10 minutes, my bumpy friend took over and chose his own pace. His owner kept shouting pointers at me, to force him to go faster, like whipping him on the side…

I didn’t really want to do that… Eventually, I gave him a lame ass tap with the leash… It couldn’t have been more than a tickle for him, but it sure as hell pissed him off! Reminding me who’s boss, he turned his head and tried to bite me!

But… Things could always be worse… (Ready for my weekend’s nickname explanation number 1?)

Aaaah, poor Lucy… Don’t get me wrong: her camel was friendly. But her camel guy was very, very friendly… If you know what I mean… 😉  He chose not to sit in his own saddle, but right behind her. Spooning on a camel! No, that sounds too cute… “Grinding on a camel” expresses the amount of discomfort that she felt way better. 🙂

The rest of the evening, under the stars, was filled with “sexual positions on a camel” jokes, “ew, ew, ew!” reactions and exorcism/ghost stories. Not the best recipe for sweet dreams…

The next morning, certain parts of my body (read: ass) refused to take on the two hour camel ride back to the city. Luckily, the girls were going by truck, that had some extra space in the trunk.

There was a lot of time left to do some wandering in the city of Pushkar and while doing so, avoiding all the cows. I didn’t feel like getting attacked by one again, like yesterday! (Man, the animals around here were not feeling me…)

Two bus rides and two taxis later, I was back in Jaipur.. And starving! We ordered some pizza, but of course, the delivery guy couldn’t find the apartment… So I went outside, searching for him and trying to give directions, when… (Yup… Explanation “harassment overload” number 2, coming up…)

Three guys on a motorcycle spotted me, drove back, passed me by twice and then had the audacity to grab my ass, before speeding off! For God’s sake! I swear… If I wouldn’t have been on the phone and in complete shock for like 5 seconds…

R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

Please! 🙂

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3 comments on “May 28 – 29, 2016

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